commuting gripes

I don't mind commuting. The bus comes right to my front door, and the subway drops me a block away from work. I like the fact that $200 a month buys me about 2 hours a day to be transported place to place, while napping. The bus driver can deal with the stress and anxiety that comes hand in hand with driving in New York/New Jersey, in rush hour, no less. But during those hours I have the freedom to a)fall out of consciousness or b)catch up on bbm-ing.
I don't mean - or try- to sugarcoat public transportation. It can get weird, uncomfortable, unpredictable, so on and so forth. The following really fucking pissed me off this week.

temperature control
Last summer when I was interning, I would shamelessly bring an ugly green fleece blanket onto the freezing, over-air conditioned bus, and go right to sleep. I need to do that again. On Monday, the bus was practically empty. Which made it even colder. Was the bus driver mad at us? The below-zero air blew out of the quarter-sized vents above me with such force my bones ached. It's August, so I'm obviously usually in a dress or short sleeves. I will rethink my outfit choices from here on forth. That morning, I curled up into a ball so tight someone could put me back into my mom's womb. Just kidding, she's like 85lbs. I actually had goosebumps. I was so miserable for those 45 minutes I almost cried, but held back in fear of them freezing onto my cheeks.

oh look its the 162 bus.

And that goes in the other direction, too. When my sister and I haul ass through the subway system and port authority to try and get on the bus home as soon as possible, we almost always find ourselves in a really crowded line at the gate. Everyone is sweating. I'm not kidding, everyone is glistening or has fat balls of sweat on their forehead. Even my sister who never sweats to the point that I think she lacks pores. One time we got on the bus, and I was ready to pass out from the heat (but keep in mind I have hot flashes like a menopausal woman too). We sat in the front, and I leaned over to (politely) ask the bus driver to turn the air conditioning on. In my mind, I pictured me asking, him apologizing, why of course, then turning it on, everyone clapping and cooling off. In real life....ignored. Completely. The asshole didn't bat an eyelash. I immediately became EXTREMELY aware of all the strangers around me, the passengers staring. I sank back into my seat full of shame and, oh, still sweating.

the phone talker
I, personally, let my relationships suffer because I ignore their phone calls or don't call them back. But I have reason! When I'm not working, I'm hauling ass to get TO work or to get home. Otherwise, I'm either underground or submersed in water (...tunnel) or binge eating at the dinner table or showering or getting to bed. You get my point. So sorry for my lack of service or, most importantly, my CONSIDERATION for those around me.
I got on the bus home the other day, really excited to put on my iPod and not really listen to it - or maybe for the 30 seconds before I fall into a dead coma. (PS does anyone else magically wake up right before their stop? crazy) This crazy bitch decided to dial up an old relative, or something, as soon as the bus got to rolling. What the hell, I heard everything from her daughter going on interviews to her next scheduled pedicure. And she had this ridiculous, obnoxious, honky laugh. I fucking hated her. I liked her shoes though.

the person that does not deserve public transportation
You will get this once a month, or when you've wronged the gods and they're making you pay. Sit down, adjust seat, get comfy, close your eyes. Then......a sharp finger poking at your arm fat. "EXCUSE ME??EXCUSE ME. Can you please move up your chair." No, they didn't ask, they demanded. I'm a passive aggressive vagina, so I give them my best "hate you" look and pull my chair up a little..very slowly..who has the last laugh now? Okay I'm pathetic. But honestly, and I've talked about this with many commuters, NJ Transit wouldn't give you the option of reclining if they felt it was that unbearable for an hour MAXIMUM. I've even sat in front of the asshole with the giant cardboard box in his lap that forced me to sit at a ninety degree angle for 30 minutes. I felt like I was getting punished. So sorry your legs are fat/unnecessarily long/or you yourself are just fat. Let me recline in peace, motherfucker.

smelly person
no example necessary.. you know.

I think I'm going to keep this post an open post, because I'm sure you have your stories too. peace love and nj transit.